{"product_id":"classified-redacted-doctor-advice-tee-absurdist-overthinker-zipper-smile-graphic-t-shirt","title":"Classified Redacted Doctor Advice Tee Absurdist Overthinker Zipper Smile Graphic T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor those medical recommendations you’ve officially categorized as \"none of my business.\" A brilliant new twist for the Guilty Kick \"Nobody Knows\" confession line, the \"Redacted doctor advice\" tee is the ultimate uniform for anyone practicing aggressive selective hearing. Featuring a beautifully minimalist, vintage-inspired layout, the graphic showcases a bold \"CLASSIFIED\" stamp under our signature zipper-mouthed smiley face. Beneath it, a distressed typewriter font proudly confesses the ultimate act of stubborn defiance: \"My doctor told me to stop [REDACTED]. I did not stop [REDACTED].\" It’s the perfect satirical graphic tee for dodging unwanted health lectures, surviving an exhausting corporate week on pure caffeine, or silently letting the world know your coping mechanisms are heavily classified. Whether your redacted activities involve eating leftover pizza for breakfast, running on three hours of sleep, or ignoring your daily water intake goals, this shirt lets you plead the fifth with absolute style. Crafted from premium, ultra-soft cotton for a relaxed fit, it delivers a comfortable, low-key look that keeps your secrets safe and your vibe completely unbothered.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features - Ribbed knit collar with seam for shape retention - With side seams for structural support - Shoulder tape for stability - Unisex tee for adults - Light fabric with classic fit - 100% cotton - Great for accessorizing and all-season wear Care instructions - Do not dryclean - Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F) - Do not bleach - Tumble dry: low heat - Iron, steam or dry: low heat\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Solid Black \/ XS","offer_id":49477911937253,"sku":"16793830746659560458","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Heavy Metal \/ XS","offer_id":49477911970021,"sku":"18513547603299393999","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Midnight Navy \/ XS","offer_id":49477912002789,"sku":"55705870470385521807","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Military Green \/ XS","offer_id":49477912035557,"sku":"28729315775767508833","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Royal \/ XS","offer_id":49477912068325,"sku":"18238483732958794264","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ S","offer_id":49477912101093,"sku":"11605303299375653192","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Cool Blue \/ S","offer_id":49477912133861,"sku":"17358028132645783060","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Dark Chocolate \/ S","offer_id":49477912166629,"sku":"27425752252846840759","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Forest Green \/ S","offer_id":49477912199397,"sku":"30364602868606960870","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Heavy Metal \/ S","offer_id":49477912232165,"sku":"18359718687514035626","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Indigo \/ S","offer_id":49477912264933,"sku":"66678687857090558607","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Maroon \/ S","offer_id":49477912297701,"sku":"26236022725122191551","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Midnight Navy \/ S","offer_id":49477912330469,"sku":"27220935575272642755","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Military Green \/ S","offer_id":49477912363237,"sku":"21341449737968311850","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Purple Rush \/ S","offer_id":49477912396005,"sku":"12608239586717031556","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Royal \/ S","offer_id":49477912428773,"sku":"17405746218943015595","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ M","offer_id":49477912461541,"sku":"32569423864975252043","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Cool Blue \/ M","offer_id":49477912494309,"sku":"14108264095131335847","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Dark Chocolate \/ M","offer_id":49477912527077,"sku":"26513062999682677268","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Forest Green \/ M","offer_id":49477912559845,"sku":"29013517865790658077","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Heavy Metal \/ M","offer_id":49477912592613,"sku":"24449979016447635191","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Indigo \/ M","offer_id":49477912625381,"sku":"14119907064323369874","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Maroon \/ M","offer_id":49477912658149,"sku":"11553200988984963262","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Midnight Navy \/ M","offer_id":49477912690917,"sku":"25121522394272861351","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Military Green \/ M","offer_id":49477912723685,"sku":"12429298636198308840","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Purple Rush \/ M","offer_id":49477912756453,"sku":"89620547826304236849","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Royal \/ M","offer_id":49477912789221,"sku":"19824410291511619453","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ L","offer_id":49477912821989,"sku":"12328109629070879931","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Cool Blue \/ L","offer_id":49477912854757,"sku":"23845016980663728152","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Dark Chocolate \/ L","offer_id":49477912887525,"sku":"77875276607142102092","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Forest Green \/ L","offer_id":49477912920293,"sku":"53522389199037347065","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Heavy Metal \/ L","offer_id":49477912953061,"sku":"22020551178825204101","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Indigo \/ L","offer_id":49477912985829,"sku":"30232687161339576684","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Maroon \/ L","offer_id":49477913018597,"sku":"28540078889910653063","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Midnight Navy \/ L","offer_id":49477913051365,"sku":"21313416467706354562","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Military Green \/ L","offer_id":49477913084133,"sku":"27587522795851828459","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Purple Rush \/ L","offer_id":49477913116901,"sku":"16786438705230152273","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Royal \/ L","offer_id":49477913149669,"sku":"32222619154003006305","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ XL","offer_id":49477913182437,"sku":"30660419488028167705","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Cool Blue \/ XL","offer_id":49477913215205,"sku":"19000706025266474862","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Dark Chocolate \/ XL","offer_id":49477913247973,"sku":"17939866931755630626","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Forest Green \/ XL","offer_id":49477913280741,"sku":"24310554760945869598","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Heavy Metal \/ XL","offer_id":49477913313509,"sku":"27011276115963587872","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Indigo \/ XL","offer_id":49477913346277,"sku":"10707774020069796467","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Maroon \/ XL","offer_id":49477913379045,"sku":"13165186044819094350","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Midnight Navy \/ XL","offer_id":49477913411813,"sku":"11673759927495877858","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Military Green \/ XL","offer_id":49477913444581,"sku":"10090064992920727751","price":17.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Purple Rush \/ XL","offer_id":49477913477349,"sku":"14851362414226546910","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Royal \/ XL","offer_id":49477913510117,"sku":"83601485511873128220","price":25.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":49477913542885,"sku":"23672385364935929242","price":20.74,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Cool Blue \/ 2XL","offer_id":49477913575653,"sku":"33044328815034534690","price":30.23,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Dark Chocolate \/ 2XL","offer_id":49477913608421,"sku":"22868212974131424740","price":20.74,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Forest Green \/ 2XL","offer_id":49477913641189,"sku":"56469698728030629987","price":20.74,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Heavy Metal \/ 2XL","offer_id":49477913673957,"sku":"21246709430062458326","price":20.74,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Indigo \/ 2XL","offer_id":49477913706725,"sku":"33375135157438454230","price":20.74,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Maroon \/ 2XL","offer_id":49477913739493,"sku":"32003701187176153666","price":30.23,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Midnight Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":49477913772261,"sku":"12552722019055283990","price":20.74,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Military Green \/ 2XL","offer_id":49477913805029,"sku":"33057134910486776062","price":20.74,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Purple Rush \/ 2XL","offer_id":49477913837797,"sku":"17747436268420303067","price":30.23,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Royal \/ 2XL","offer_id":49477913870565,"sku":"13581422041765079271","price":30.23,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":49477913903333,"sku":"12060094885234943537","price":23.41,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Cool Blue \/ 3XL","offer_id":49477913936101,"sku":"19705353880525218413","price":34.3,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Dark Chocolate \/ 3XL","offer_id":49477913968869,"sku":"22466642333812160210","price":23.41,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Forest Green \/ 3XL","offer_id":49477914001637,"sku":"29243895003018323809","price":23.41,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Heavy Metal \/ 3XL","offer_id":49477914034405,"sku":"16327857593552423072","price":23.41,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Indigo \/ 3XL","offer_id":49477914067173,"sku":"27954001304004320618","price":23.41,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Maroon \/ 3XL","offer_id":49477914099941,"sku":"15388339572962994153","price":34.3,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Midnight Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":49477914132709,"sku":"45963254243787030076","price":23.41,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Military Green \/ 3XL","offer_id":49477914165477,"sku":"33464523423294309697","price":23.41,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Purple Rush \/ 3XL","offer_id":49477914198245,"sku":"21872786641701135393","price":34.3,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Royal \/ 3XL","offer_id":49477914231013,"sku":"18157964935884853566","price":34.3,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":49477914263781,"sku":"10251441024464309909","price":25.8,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Heavy Metal \/ 4XL","offer_id":49477914296549,"sku":"28946553508729823230","price":25.8,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Midnight Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":49477914329317,"sku":"73023824631224667851","price":25.8,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Royal \/ 4XL","offer_id":49477914362085,"sku":"32298488186553349432","price":37.92,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":49477914394853,"sku":"18356265188732574492","price":27.56,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0779\/2544\/9957\/files\/tattooed-girl-mockup-standing-while-wearing-a-round-neck-tee-against-a-solid-color-background-a17178_56.png?v=1780613633","url":"https:\/\/guiltykick.com\/products\/classified-redacted-doctor-advice-tee-absurdist-overthinker-zipper-smile-graphic-t-shirt","provider":"Guilty Kick Apparel","version":"1.0","type":"link"}