{"product_id":"nobody-knows-i-dont-wear-pants-on-video-calls-remote-work-satire","title":"Nobody Knows I Don't Wear Pants On Video Calls Remote Work Satire","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eProfessionalism is a frame-by-frame negotiation and you have been winning since 2020. The blazer is doing its job. The background is tastefully blurred. The pants situation is between you and the chair.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThe confession is in dark grey below the zipper face — barely visible, just like your lower half on that quarterly review call. Wear it to your next in-person meeting. Let someone read it mid-handshake.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eNobody knows. HR has not been informed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003ePart of the Guilty Kick Nobody Knows collection — wearable confessions for remote workers operating at peak efficiency.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eBlack. Unisex fit. Business casual from the waist up.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- Lightweight 100% cotton body (heathers contain 10% polyester) — 4.3 oz\/yd² (146 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e- Classic crew neckline with ribbed knit collar and seam for shape retention\u003cbr\u003e- Side seams and shoulder tape for improved structure and reduced stretching\u003cbr\u003e- Direct-to-Film (DTF) sleeve print for crisp, durable graphics\u003cbr\u003e- Compliant with EU REACH, made in Honduras, 2-year EU warranty\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dry clean\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\u003cbr\u003e- Do not bleach\u003cbr\u003e- Tumble dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Iron, steam or dry: low heat\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Solid Black \/ XS","offer_id":48902838976741,"sku":"30167268283857659165","price":18.36,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ S","offer_id":48902839009509,"sku":"40602631467057292598","price":18.36,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ M","offer_id":48902839042277,"sku":"24836520208790927584","price":18.36,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ L","offer_id":48902839075045,"sku":"31046780603669541007","price":18.36,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ XL","offer_id":48902839107813,"sku":"28822614898691583427","price":18.36,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":48902839140581,"sku":"18734442179365494224","price":22.26,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":48902839173349,"sku":"10565013285001756111","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":48902839206117,"sku":"16446405442926667594","price":28.38,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Solid Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":48902839238885,"sku":"16768033230788584524","price":30.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0779\/2544\/9957\/files\/nobody-knows-i-dont-wear-pants-on-video-calls-remote-work-satireguilty-kick-apparel-9624089.png?v=1777389130","url":"https:\/\/guiltykick.com\/products\/nobody-knows-i-dont-wear-pants-on-video-calls-remote-work-satire","provider":"Guilty Kick Apparel","version":"1.0","type":"link"}