Nobody Knows I Don't Wear Pants On Video Calls Remote Work Satire
Description
Professionalism is a frame-by-frame negotiation and you have been winning since 2020. The blazer is doing its job. The background is tastefully blurred. The pants situation is between you and the chair.
The confession is in dark grey below the zipper face — barely visible, just like your lower half on that quarterly review call. Wear it to your next in-person meeting. Let someone read it mid-handshake.
Nobody knows. HR has not been informed.
Part of the Guilty Kick Nobody Knows collection — wearable confessions for remote workers operating at peak efficiency.
Black. Unisex fit. Business casual from the waist up.
Product features
- Lightweight 100% cotton body (heathers contain 10% polyester) — 4.3 oz/yd² (146 g/m²)
- Classic crew neckline with ribbed knit collar and seam for shape retention
- Side seams and shoulder tape for improved structure and reduced stretching
- Direct-to-Film (DTF) sleeve print for crisp, durable graphics
- Compliant with EU REACH, made in Honduras, 2-year EU warranty
Care instructions
- Do not dry clean
- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)
- Do not bleach
- Tumble dry: low heat
- Iron, steam or dry: low heat
Product Details
Product Features
- Ribbed knit collar with seam for long-lasting shape retention
- Side seams for added structure and durability
- Shoulder tape for enhanced stability and fit
- Unisex fit designed for adults
- Lightweight fabric with a classic fit
- Fabric blend (Heather colors): 90% cotton, 10% polyester
- Perfect for layering, accessorizing, and year-round wear
Care Instructions
- Machine wash cold (max 30°C / 90°F)
- Do not bleach
- Tumble dry on low heat
- Iron, steam, or dry on low heat
- Do not dry clean