Nobody Knows: The Botanical Mortician
Description
Your Instagram says "Urban Jungle," but your trash can says "Mass Casualty Event." Behind every thriving succulent on your windowsill lies a silent graveyard of ferns, fiddle-leaf figs, and "unkillable" cacti that simply couldn't survive your unique brand of unintentional abandonment. A darkly relatable addition to the Guilty Kick "Nobody Knows" Collection, this t-shirt is a badge of honor for the chronically forgetful gardener. It’s for the person who buys a new pothos to cover the withered remains of the old one, the homeowner who views a watering can as a decorative sculpture, and anyone who has ever apologized to a decorative silk plant out of habit. Wear it to the nursery while you scout your next victim—your secret is safe with us.
Product features - Ribbed knit collar with seam for shape retention - With side seams for structural support - Shoulder tape for stability - Unisex tee for adults - Light fabric with classic fit - Fabric blends: Heather colors - 90% cotton, 10% polyester - Great for accessorizing and all-season wear Care instructions - Do not dry-clean - Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F) - Do not bleach - Tumble dry: low heat - Iron, steam or dry: low heat
Product Details
Product Features
- Ribbed knit collar with seam for long-lasting shape retention
- Side seams for added structure and durability
- Shoulder tape for enhanced stability and fit
- Unisex fit designed for adults
- Lightweight fabric with a classic fit
- Fabric blend (Heather colors): 90% cotton, 10% polyester
- Perfect for layering, accessorizing, and year-round wear
Care Instructions
- Machine wash cold (max 30°C / 90°F)
- Do not bleach
- Tumble dry on low heat
- Iron, steam, or dry on low heat
- Do not dry clean